christianity done gone stupidly

So my friend handed me a fake million dollar bill that someone at her work had been handed by a costumer. I turned it over and read this:

The million dollar question: will you go to heaven when you die? Here's a quick test. Have you ever told a lie, stolen anything, or used God's name in vain? Jesus said, "Whoever looks at a women to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Have you looked with lust? Will you be guilty on judgement day? If you have done those things, God sees you as a lying, thieving, blasphemous, adulterer at heart. The Bible warns that if you are guilty you will end up in hell. that's not God's will. He sent his son to suffer and die on the cross for you. You broke God's law, but Jesus paid your fine. That means He can legally dismiss your case. He can commute your death sentence. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." Then he rose from the dead and defeated death. Please, repent (turn away from sin) today and trust alone in Jesus, and God will grant you the gift of everlasting life, then read your Bible daily and obey it.

The ice cream employee had been handed an infamous tract, most likely by an extremely right-winged Christian who said something witty when he/she had handed it to the girl. Most likely to the affect of "Here's a million dollars to save your life" or maybe "Here, keep the tip. God bless you."

I read yesterday in the New York Times that archeologists found what was believed to be another chapter in the book of Matthew 2 years ago, and finally have been able to translate a few sentences of it:

And Jesus said unto them, "Don't you dare give people little pieces of paper that try to convince them to be saved by me. I mean...seriously. How stupid do you have to be to do that? Trying to explain Christianity in a little booklet is like trying to explain the biological functions of a bear in one sentence, or trying to explain how to make a MACBOOK PRO out of two sticks and a raccoon hat."

People that evangelize wonder why some people get so offended when they go out and tell people that "Jesus loves you and he died on the cross for your sins, did you know that?". I propose that asking someone that is like asking someone if they knew the sky was blue, or if they knew the story of "The 3 Little Pigs".

The I feel that the majority of people (I'm talking about in America) know the story of Christianity. In fact, they know a lot about different religions. A lot of people know that if you're Muslim you get 40 virgins if you go to paradise, if you're a Catholic you believe that the Virgin Mary is really important, if you're Jewish you aren't supposed to eat certain things, that there's Allah and God, and Mohammed and Jesus, etc.etc. The point is: a lot of people know the story of Christianity, just as they do with a lot of other religions. The tough part of religion is not knowing the stories of each one, but believing the concepts, stories, and teachings of them.

Pyschology 101

Question: Can you get someone (you don't even know) to add to/change/rearrange their belief system and their lifestyle based on any sort of paper handout?

Answer: Of course not you idiot, don't you have any sort of common sense?

If you give someone on the street a Harry Potter book, they might like the story, but they definitely won't believe in wizards based off the book.

If you give someone on the street a tract about Christianity, they might like the story, but they definitely won't believe the message based off the tract.

But if someone saw a wizard in action; making things fly, casting spells that make food appear, making potions that make you look like someone else, then they would be much more likely to believe in magic and wizards.

If someone saw a Christian in action; living selflessly, loving everyone without any sort of catch, trying to better themselves as a person before trying to "fix" other people, showing integrity, living concepts of Jesus Christ, being honest about their life--then they would be much more likely to believe that there is a God that loves them, a Christ that died for them, and salvation to be found.

To my brothers and sisters who are not Christian: I deeply and sincerely apologize for all the ignorant Christians that you have and will encounter that try to sell their religion to you as if it's something that can be marketed. These people are very far away from what (I believe) it means to be a Christian. But, they are stuck in their tradition, in their living life with the blinders on--refusing to think of the consequences of their actions by being so narrow minded and stupid.

To my brothers and sisters who are Christian: I deeply and sincerely ask you to stop handing out tracts to people. If you believe that your God, your Christ, your salvation...can be explained in anything short of a life lived, than you have not even begun to grasp your religion. People should know you by your good works, not by your loud and abrasive words and your small print booklets. You can't "win one over for God" (which by the way, is STILL, TOTALLY, and UTTERLY missing the point) through being door to door sales representatives. Be it at your school, your work, your campus, your friends... no one wants to be gently coerced into buying things. But when you actually talk with someone. Actually get to know someone, actually care (and NOT caring because you have intention of sharing your religion, but care because you truly appreciate them as a person), you would be surprised how open people are. But it takes genuinely caring about them first. This means caring about them without hiding the Bible behind your back, like on some sort of secret mission.

We all want to choose for ourselves, not be bullied or persuaded into being this that or the other. The sooner Christians can understand this, the better it will be.

Oh, be joyful.

My statement regarding The Kaleidoscope, Brighter

This summer has been pretty up and down in The Kaleidoscope, Brighter camp.

I have finally come to the extremely tough decision that I will be leaving the band. There is no dramatic story to this; I have been with the band for 2 years, since it started. I have seen 4 friends come and go from this band, some because of personal differences, and other because of different life directions. Now finally it is my time to leave too. This is not personal differences between myself and the band, but a different vision.

I am hoping that I will be able to play a farewell show with the band in Bowling Green, OH in the late summer/early fall, but I'll keep you updated about it.

The next step for myself is simply this: make music. I will not be starting a new band, I will not be starting a "solo project" that plays shows, no myspace, no facebook musician page, etc. I will be, plain and simple, making music. So be on the lookout for some new songs from me in the late fall, and some spoken word pieces by the end of the summer, both of which I am super stoked about.

Thank you for supporting me and all of my creative endeavors. Please continue to support The Kaleidoscope, Brighter also as they continue making music.

an analyzation and railing against "myspace bands"

Urban Dictionary definition of "Myspace Band":

1.	Myspace Band
	1. A band whose popularity comes from their popularity on myspace.com, thus lacking any REAL credibility in today's music scene. This lack of credibility comes from the simplicity through which their popularity is achieved: record songs with decent sound quality, take some pictures of yourself, and add as many friends as possible. This formula thus saturates the music scene with hundreds of thousands of bands that will never make it. Those that do, will have no lasting value. These bands typically will eventually replaced by a newer, more hip, band (See also: flavor of the week). 2. A band followed typically by only the "myspace generation" Myspacer1: "Brah, I'm telling you,(insert name of current flavor of the week band here) will be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame one day." LogicalGuy: "That myspace band, or any other myspace band for that matter, will ever be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame"

Last night I went out with some friends to more or less finally see a band that we all talk a lot of smack about...basically to give them a fair chance.

What I encountered was more than disturbing, so please brace yourselves:

For starters, I am in a band myself. We love playing music, and we try everything we can to be genuine and not fake anything. That being said, we have to rely on myspace to get our music out to people, as do hundreds and thousands of both famous and local (such as we are) bands.

If you have not frequented myspace for a while, good for you. Lord knows I deleted my personal account years ago and even the band one doesn't see too much action. That being said, for those of you who are unfamiliar how a myspace band page works: you have a player with your songs on it, and the number of times your songs have been played next to each title. At the bottom of the player it lists the number of total plays you have. In the middle of your page is also your friend count, or, how many other myspace profiles are linked to yours.

Generally these two numbers can be used to gage how popular a band is. Well...no, not anymore.

For instance: We have 2646 "myspace friends" (saying myspace so much makes me cringe I feel like a 16 year old girl), and 14,000ish total plays of our songs.

The band I am ranting about has: OVER 1,000,000 total plays of their songs, along with OVER 31,000 myspace friends, along with over 12,000 comments on their page (TKB has about 400?).

So anyways, my friends and I went to check out this band that has played in the area a fair number of times, easily more than TKB has. So seeing these numbers, I am expecting at least 100-200 swooped hair teen-emo kids. We get there, they start playing. There are 4 kids that came to see them. Let me say that number again. 4 kids. 4 kids who were actually watching the band (sitting down @ a table, mind you).

To start bring this together, let's go over the facts:

BAND A (the one I'm ranting about)

friends: +31,000

comments: +12,000

plays: +1,000,000

kids at their show actually watching: 4

I haven't taken a math class since senior year in high school, but to me, those numbers simply do not add up.

BUT WAIT. Here is the catch. Unknowingly to a lot of younger kids who do not have bands (1/4 kids on myspace?), there are "bots". Bots are simply this: kids (or programs) that enable you to have hundreds and thousands of plays per pay (or per song), along with comments and friends. A tell tail sign that a band is using a bot is one of two ways:

1. Scroll through their comments and see how many are actually from kids. Better yet, kids that commented the band before the band spammed them with "Hey we're The LollyPop Gang and we have a new record out! Check us out and tell your friends!". Also note how many of the comments are more band spammers/general spam.

2. Their myspace player lists 1,000,000 total plays, the band has had a myspace for less than 2 years, and their actually DAILY play count is 9.

A main point of doing this, is so when said myspace band spams a record label with their crappy music and press kit and myspace link via email, the band thinks "Oh, the record label will see our myspace page and all our friends and comments and plays and sweet hair cuts and outfits that they'll just HAVE to sign us! I mean, we are SO LEGIT!".

Unfortunately for all these bands, record labels are NOT as dumb as the myspace band is, and are more than aware of their bullcrap tactics.

Whereas if you check out some up and coming bands I really dig, such as All Get Out and All the Day Holiday, you will not find millions of (fake) plays, millions of (fake) friends, or millions of (spam) comments. What you will find if you go to their myspace is music. Real. Genuine. Music.

And THAT is why THEY are on legit labels, and do all the sweet things that they do. Because they actually give a crap about music, and not about myspace.

I think if bands started to care more about making music that is genuine, and stopped worrying about their online image, it would be right around the same time hell would freeze over.

The lesson: bands can fake the number of friends, plays, and comments all they want, but the number of people at your show, and the number of kids that are actually into it, does not lie. At all.

it's hard to be the better man, when you forget you're trying

I wrote and then rewrote this blog over a course of several hours. One version was a good 3 microsoft word (single spaced) document. The other was a simple sentence. So hopefully this is a good mix of the two.

At times, I am one of the most over-confident person I know. To the outside eye, I know what I am doing, and I back everything I say 100%. But, as Big Daddy would say, "BULL".

I am deathly scared of trying my hardest to fight off my demons, without anyone ever telling me good job.

I am even more scared of trying to be a gentleman to women, but no girl I love ever saying to me "You know, I really do think you're amazing because you honestly try and treat me as a girl should be treated."

To me, I see soo many dudes being jerks to girls, and soo many girls being totally okay with it. Dudes shutting up their conscience to use girls so they can get what they want, and girls shutting up their conscience so they can give guys what they want...for whatever the reasons are.

If there is one thing I can honestly say I have consistently tried to be better at in my life, it's being a gentleman. But sometimes it is soo freaking hard to do. Sometimes I think "What if no one even notices that I try? What if no one CARES that I try? What if I treat a girl the way (I believe) she should be treated and she goes back to dudes that just don't care like I do? That just use her for what they want." then I think "What's the point of trying so hard like I do if no one is ever even going to care?".

I'm not saying perfect by any stretch of the imagination, Lord knows I struggle every day to do this, and I know it's awful to compare myself to others.

But I can't help thinking: what's the point of trying to be a better man if you never actually make a dent in someone's life in a positive way? What's the point in trying if no one ever cares that you tried?

Sometimes I just feel like I will always be taken for granted in this regard.

And I know the point of living a good life is not to have people pat you on the back and tell you "Good job" all the time. But sometimes it'd be nice to feel noticed. I think.

build your heart of diamonds and you won't need no ring

For those of you who have known me for a long time, you know that I go through spouts of depression.

For those of you who don't know me at all, I go through spouts of depression. They're never triggered by anything, and sometimes they can go months without even occurring. But at random times throughout my life I feel what can only be described (as stupid as this sounds) as a cloud over my spirit, and a hurricane in my heart.

My freshman year of college was the best example for a too long spout of depression that ultimately resulted in me making some awful choices, and eventually getting kicked out of college.

This past week, plus now a few days I've felt this relentless depression/bipolar streak. In one hour I'll go from super happy to really sad and end up feeling that cloud for the rest of the day. And it really, really sucks.

Today was supposed to be a really fun day, but the whole time I was supposed to be enjoying myself, I felt my smile strain more and more because I did not want to be the idiot that lets his personal problems get in the way of a special day.

Depression is the worst (for me) when I am with someone I care about, then my head starts forming all this weird situations about what is actually going on. I would say 1/100 of what I think in this state is actually true. But either way, when I feel like this, I find it sooooo hard to trust people.

There's a line from a Matthew Good song

"Build your heart of diamonds and you won't need no ring"

And sometimes that is EXACTLY how I feel. I wish I could do that. I often feel that I have SUCH a soft heart, but have no good way at ALL of protecting it from the seemingly inevitable hurt of being vulnerable with those you care about.

But I know in my HEART underneath that damn rain cloud that caring about someone while not wanting or expecting anything in return is one of the best feelings I have ever felt.

Of course, someone caring about you back IS essential for functioning relationships, but you should already care about them regardless. Does that make any sense? I hope so, and if not it made sense to me in my brain.

Truly caring about someone, and enjoying who they are, with no expectations and refusing reciprocation's based on a feeling of obligation, not knowing if I will ever be good enough for anyone is one of the most terrifying thoughts to me.

Not knowing if anyone could, or will care about me as much as I care about other people looms over my heart sometimes just as much as joy and hope and love do. And it scares the hell out of me.

what would your Jesus compromise?

Disclaimer: if you're not either an active or passive Christian please don't read this blog, because this is a message for Christians and I don't want to get nonChristians confused or offend as to what I'm talking about.

I'm not saying you're dumb!!!! I'm just saying that I don't want to offend you, in case you might not entirely understand what I'm trying to say.

"It's only one time getting drunk, I'm in college, I just want to have fun!"

"I just know that God brought us together, so I think we should sleep together tonight. It's seriously not a big deal, we're just sleeping- not having sex! But maybe we just shouldn't tell anyone regardless..."

"Swearing? Really? Who cares! People swear all the time, Christians included!"

"It's okay self, it's just porn. No one will even know. Seriously."

"Dude it's just hookah, Christian's know how to have fun too!"

"It's only a blow job...seriously, it's not even sex."

Tell me the point of bearing the name of Jesus Christ if all we do is compromise?

As Christians, we want people to look at us and see the Holy Spirit, not a mirror imagine of the onlooker. I am so tired of Christians trying to appear cool or relevant to their nonChristian friends by compromising Truth.

My friend Todd once told me and several other people that were arguing once that "As Christians, we are called to live above reproach"...meaning this: If people on the street heard that you were going over to "sleep with our bf/gf", what's the first thing that comes to their mind? Of course it's sex. And of course you could try and convince them that you weren't actually going to have sex, but I believe you'll be hard pressed to find someone that thinks you wouldn't be doing everything aside from "actual" sex then. Living above reproach means that you will try to not give people that foothold over you, and attempt to display Christ (ie, not your own desires) in all facets of your life.

Why do Christians decide to be the sheep that they're trying to shepherd? My new harp for this/perfect example is hookah smoking.

(those two articles, one link with each different word, are 2 of thousands that exists saying that hookah is just as bad, if not actually worse than ciggerates. god forbid that people actually take their time to do their own research before believing the "word on the street")

"Oh yeah, it's not nearly as bad as cigarettes. At ALL" I can not count on both hands how many Christians have told me that in attempt to justify their compromise. Do they even BOTHER to do the research though? Of course they don't. Of COURSE they don't. It seems that when Christians get in these compromising states, they tend to follow the loudest, most confident, and usually the dumbest sheep.

I knew a (Christian) girl once who told me how disgusting she thought hookah smoking was, and how it's just a lame excuse for other Christians to try and be relatable and cool.

Ironically enough though, this same girl, getting involved with a new group of Christians, now smokes hookah on a fairly regular basis (or at least, a lot more than not doing it at all).

Isn't it fantastic and terrible how much people change to blend in with their surroundings?

When people ask questions about myself, in regards to what religion I am, I generally respond with "active Christian". Because each day I am trying to get rid of my vices that hold me back from Jesus Christ, and that hold me back from showing Himself in my life.

And so hopefully, when people such as those who have accepted Christ but don't bother to challenge, better, or overall attempt to live a life of no compromise (according to the Bible) can respond with "passive Christian. I am saved, I love God, but I love pleasing myself and being accepted by others more".

....It only would make sense.

Now please don't be a five year old think just because I picked out hookah smoking; that I think it's the worst thing ever, and hate everyone who's associated with it. OF COURSE I DON'T. I used to do it when I was a senior in high school because I wanted to be cool, hip, and relatable too!

I am using hookah smoking as just one of hundreds of possible examples that we as Christians bend the moral bar ever so slightly so that we appear cooler, relatable, hip, fun, etcetc to people who are not Christians.

And if you think as I think "Man, Chad is calling out all these Christians in these blogs and not even talking about how messed up he is, and I bet he's got a big ol' plank in his eye" you honestly could not be further from the truth. The reason I notice these things about Christianity is because I have been there, and I still struggle with them. But you best believe though that I'm still going to try to light a fire under myself and every Christian who actually believes in living a life of no compromise. Not to mention the list I comprised above of typical Christian compromising (that I've encountered), is a list I (for the most part) pulled from my own life.

So now you have to ask yourself:

So what would your Jesus compromise to feel better about himself?

jaded

i think it's one of the kindest things when people ask "where have you been?"

i wonder if God thinks the same thing.

i'm attempting to make this blog short and sweet:

i'm far from perfect, but i'm trying daily to fight off my demons.

the problem i have is with people that do not try to continuously better themselves, and are leaders in their church. i'm not just talking staff per-say, i'm talking all the way down to the people that lead a group of twenty people in a small Bible study, who are the spiritual mentor for one person.

i think people in the church would be truly shocked and appalled if they found out just how spiritually immature some of their leaders are.

it's not necessary "the blind leading the blind". it's more like "the stupid leading the people who refuse to open their eyes"

please do NOT mistake me for saying that our church leaders should be perfect. they will never be. none of us will ever be.

i am simply saying that i believe our leaders should be trying their best to lead a Christ filled life. i DON'T want someone who is leading my Bible study to be having the EXACT SAME struggles they had in high school. i want them to have NEW ones. i want them to be constantly bettering themselves. constantly fighting off their demons. especially if they are putting themselves in positions where they could be held responsible for someone else's spiritual growth.

"i don't believe in love anymore, not from those around me who have loved before. with their broken promises, and their failed attempts, and only when it's easy- come on, admit it."

-bradley hathaway

please click this link to be sure to read all of the text, I can't format worth crap!

http://i136.photobucket.com/albums/q188/underoath300/happy-couple.jpg

I could honestly go on for days about this. But I don't need to...I honestly think that picture says about all there is to say for me.

Well, all I want to say is this:

Coming to college, I only had one expectation. One thing I was almost certain would happen since at least 8th grade. It wasn't getting kicked out of college, it wasn't starting a band, it wasn't losing and gaining friends, it wasn't joining and then leaving an on campus church (etcetc); all I thought would happen is that I would find the girl that I would spend the rest of my life with.

I'm sure some of you read that and you're thinking "WHAT A SAP" or something along those lines. Trust me, I'm thinking the SAME THING. But regardless, that's what I always thought. That was the one expectation I had coming into college, and that's probably one of the only things both good and bad that hasn't actually even come close to happening.

Next Spring I will be getting ready to graduate, and Lord willing be getting ready to move on to a full time career. And I have this awful feeling like the one thing I thought for SURE would happen in college won't actually happen. Unless God performs some sort of miracle and literally points her out to me, and me to her?

My friend Libby told me something to the affect of "You have to be in love with a persons flaws just as much as you love the person". At the time I really didn't understand, or agree with her. But the more I thought about it, the more I understood what she was saying. It's that I need to be okay with a persons flaws, I need to NOT want to change someone, and love them EXACTLY how they are. To be honest, I never really knew that before. So maybe that will be sort of a flagship for me (is that the right use of that term even haha)?

All I know for sure is I don't want to settle. That's what my friend Jeff told me once he said "Never settle for a girl who you honestly, deep down in your heart, is exactly what you want. Flaws and all." (again, there's that loving someone who their flaws thing again! he told me this 2 years ago and it took all 2 years AND someone saying something very similar for me to finally get this)

Who knows?

It never ceases to blow my mind about just how wrong I am about everything, and how little I truly understand life.

Songs that might better explain how I feel. and are a lot greater and more entertaining and beautiful than me making this blog at an attempted focused subject of my ideas of love. well. idea is the wrong word, but i'm sure you know what I mean:

copeland- love is a fast song

iglu and hartly- out there

bradley hathaway- i don't believe in love

matthew good- empty's theme park

eye alaska- miles don't mean anything